Personal Vows - An easy guide to writing wedding vows
- danceadamdance
- May 5
- 2 min read
A lot of couples ask me about is how to go about writing personal wedding vows for a ceremony. How long should they be? What should they include? Should they both be the same length? My answer is always the same - it doesn't matter as long as it's personal to you. Your guests are there and they know you, know your personalities. If you're a person who is not one for big speeches, your guests will not be surprised if your vows are short. If you're a person who likes to go on a verbal journey in your speeches, go for it! Your guests will go with you because they know you.
As long as you are speaking from the heart, you can say whatever you want!
All that being said, some couples still have no idea where to even start, so I like to give them a little guide, a tiny map to help them on their way. I tell them to start a fresh document and put just 3 sentence prompts on it. After that you just start writing and see what happens. These prompts are...
What you love about your partner
What you look forward to about marriage
What you are going to try really hard to do (the vow) to make number 2 a reality
I find this is all a couple needs to start. And they can go off on as many tangents as they want in between these three topics. They could tell a story about an atrocious holiday, they could mention a house they're building, they could tell a story about their partner's farting habits. So long as it's genuine and you (eventually) come back to these prompts, you can take that journey wherever it goes.
And if that means that it's still a short vow, it will be just as special as each word will have that much more importance when you say them. And if it's long, make it long, be proud of your speil because it's your day!
And PLEASE don't look online for generic vows or even worse ask chatgpt to write it for you. Your vows should sound like you and come from your heart and if you can do that, nothing else matters, you've written a personal vow to the person you love.
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